[not2too]

Several years ago I published a limited edition of what I call tabloid haiku...haiku composed using actual tabloid headlines as a jumping off point. Here are a few for your amusement...

Fat-sucking vampires
claim two hundred and fifty
nine lives in Lima.

Cannibal chief eats
mail order brides in New Guinea.
Cops launch man-hunt.

Istanbul business
tycoon is killed by flying
carpet. Son observes.

Fisherman uses
Barbie Doll as bass lure. “Drives
the big ones crazy.”

Man knocks himself out with boomerang.
Sues himself.
Wins three hundred K.

Cincinnati corpse
bursts into flames and burns
antique hearse in strange blaze.

Corpse checkmates two morgue
attendants in Havana.
“Miguel not dead yet!”

Weirdo breaks into
gal’s apartments to brush their
teeth. Complaints increase.

1918 news
clipping shows time traveler
with cellular phone.

Man posing as
alien conned gals into free
trip to home planet.

Crippled man arrested
for drunk driving
in his wheelchair in Hamburg.

Human skunk to wed
man with no nose!
Stinking coed has rare disease.

Neighbors call cops on staggering,
beer-guzzling, chain smoking three
year old.


Best,
not2too