little-self

ls workshop) Quest In Reality………-147
Shantnu You have mastered your senses?
Umeshwari You often twist my words; I have never said that. I simply mean, I am aware of the functions of my senses, and my body and mind have assumed secondary roles.
Shantnu Then, who is your master?
Umeshwari It comes by stages; when I understood the functions of my sense organs, my senses became master (witness). When subtle senses (senses of perception) were understood, mind became the witness. Now I think I know the composition of mind and consequentially, it too has vanished and my intellect has become the witness.
Shantnu What do you mean by ‘witness’.
Umeshwari When your body functions but you are unaware of it, mind is the witness. When mind also does not influence our life, intellect takes over and it becomes the master as it is no longer attached with the mind. These are the stages you have to go through, if you really want to reestablish your lost identity. I know you were a Jnani, in your real identity but somehow you have lost your bearings. My master told me that, I also feel this way.
Shantnu Umesh (she felt affected by his informality), I am not satisfied in my present lot. It is boring me. Please continue and fend me safely.
Angelee suddenly placed before them two glasses of apple juice which was a signal for lunch break. After sipping juice they proceeded to the cottage for lunch.
Umeshwari took only a few pieces of salad, whereas Shantnu had a sumptuous filling. Angelee had prepared a mixture of local and Punjabi dishes. His hunger did not seem to quench. Seeing the empty plate of Umeshwari, he had to stop himself out of sheer shame and decorum.
Shantnu That’s all? You could die of starvation, don’t you realize?
Umeshwari But I am on this diet for the last ten years. Of course, sometime there is variation. Instead of apple I may take two bananas or I may take two chapattis in the evening. When I go home, I can’t see my Papa unhappy.
Shantnu On this meager diet but still you look youthful and blooming! Forgive my impertinence. How is this possible?
Umeshwari In the beginning there was some maladjustment as due to restricted dieting, stored wastes/toxins are washed out of the system. There appears some weakness but gradually system adapts to the new routine and rejuvenation of cells starts. Every muscle in organs and parts of the body gets new leash of life. It is a rejuvenation of the body. Body energy and mental faculties increase. Same is the case with other senses. The less trash we feed them, more rejuvenating they become.
Come on, you must take afternoon siesta. We meet at dinner time and that is at 6P.M.
After their evening meals, they were strolling in the orchard.
Shantnu I notice you speak very less. It is because of me, you haven to speak a lot. I am sorry for that.
Umeshwari You are right. I make minimum use of my senses. Rather you can say that I am foregoing the use of my body for my comforts. It is good for me as it is a means to my goal. I am also housed in it. Otherwise it is a shell and a machine. Nothing else!
Shantnu From tomorrow morning I am also following you. I will take only what you are taking. My teaching starts in earnest. A very personal question if you don’t mind.
Umeshwari Shoot.
Shantnu Have you slept with any man? I know you are a virgin. But my senses, highly charged they might be, are not able to penetrate your field of meditation. I am able to tell about the gross level thinking but I am blocked if you are engaged in higher level of thoughts. The mind of ordinary persons is like an open book to me but I can’t penetrate your mind, perhaps, your mind does not exist, when you are engaged in meditation!
Umeshwari When I reached the age I needed a man, I had already reached joy state; which is higher than pleasure-state. So I did not need the baser pleasures of the senses. When I have the source at my command, would I need the services of lower tools; grace of my Master has blessed me the realms whereupon I look down only to stare at baser levels, in them humanity is gorging in the sloth of lust, greed, envy, anger and attachments. These are baser qualities found in animal world but humanity seems to ravel in them. I pity their lot and feel fortunate that my Master has taken me away or I would also have been frothing in the same mire! About your personal query, it is no. Does it make your ego happy?
Shantnu I am beginning to feel happy in your company. May it never come to an end!
Tbc…..