There is a real theory of everything and it is based on a number that we say is undefined. That is why we have overlooked it. 1/0 is the God number, the mathematical definition of everything itself, that which comprises both positive
and negative aspects of time and energy.
I like your analogy of the fish. Let me say that we are in such a sea and it is called the speed of light. Once we realize that we can exceed the speed of light using absolute acceleration and transcend time itself, we will be truely like a fish out of water. Everyone should be ready and have great expectations. For I can assure you, having the TOE is even more fun than looking for it

Understanding it will revolutionize mankind forever and allow us to reach out into the universe and beyond.